During our Unadilla school days John Offenberg was much younger than me. Now we’re almost the same age. That happens gradually and gains momentum over time.
John knows a lot of old stories about some of the unique individuals of his hometown. “Unadilla has had more characters per capita than anybody, anywhere,” he said with a knowing grin.
There are too many to cover, even if limited to Hall of Fame contenders. Plus many of the stories aren’t mine to tell. It’s best that families pass them on or let them fade. Here’s a sampling from a recent sit-down with John.
Mr. Ira Farmer warrants the character title because of physical toughness. He was run over by a loaded pulpwood truck, which crushed his pelvis, damaged his spleen, and broke multiple ribs. When the emergency room doctor asked if he’d taken anything for pain, Mr. Farmer said, “I took two aspirin yestiddy evening.” That was the day before the accident.
Someone commented to his son-in-law, H. T. Moats, how remarkable it was Mr. Farmer survived. H.T. explained nonchalantly, “He was in a sandbed.”
H.T. was equally durable. Two people were required to run the earliest chainsaws. H.T. and another man would operate one all day long with only short breaks. Not many could handle such a grueling job at that pace.
He also survived a horrific mishap, a near fatality caused by staying too long at Bryce Broxton’s beer joint. H.T. left The Bloody Bucket and stretched out on the ground behind a station wagon to nap. The car belonged to a lady friend of Mr. Broxton’s, who had stopped by to see him. When she left she backed over H.T’s head, then pulled forward to see what she hit. It was a cringeworthy injury but didn’t put him out of circulation.
A lot of stories from the mid 1900s involved The Bloody Bucket. Some remained close to the truth, while others have been gently embellished. A memorable street fight originated there when a man reached for his knife. The other fellow ran across Highway 41 to a gas station that never closed and borrowed a sawed-off cue stick. The cue stick pounded out an enduring truce.
One of my favorite stories about The Bloody Bucket involved Rev. A. B. Hosea, beloved pastor of Unadilla First Baptist decades ago. When he surprised the crowd one day, men began hiding their beers. He told them that wasn’t necessary, that he came to invite them to join a newly-formed Sunday School Class. The class gained a few members, and Brother Hosea gained a ton of respect.
Eubilla, a dance hall just south of town, no doubt had several characters on hand one infamous night. Young men from Pinehurst, Vienna, and Unadilla met there for a three-town showdown. Recollections vary as to details, but all have the same ending. A young Harold Owens, new to Unadilla by marriage, stepped forward when a challenge to the town was issued. With a single swing he attained folklore status. Years later he made an excellent mayor.
John is probably right about Unadilla having more characters than other places. He has plenty of stories to make a solid case. That kid from school is 70 now and still lives in the town he loves. He hopes its old tales aren’t soon forgotten.
I share that hope with John, and can say one thing with confidence. If the State of Georgia opens a Characters Hall of Fame, Unadilla has a good shot at getting the longest hall.